Monday, November 14, 2016

Dear Diane

Dear Diane,
I am you. The part of you that makes decisions. The other part of you that has to live with those decisions as well. And also gets to feel how they affect you, good or bad.  I do want you to know I try very hard to get it right because feeling what you feel when it doesn't turn out as I expected is no picnic for me either sister.  You always joke and cover my side by saying you have eyes in your "ass" because you cant see anything until its passed...  Thank you but it is the truth.  Sometimes I cant see it and when I do I think I can make it all good as your license plate reads:  "ALSWELL!"  Even when it is not.  I never like letting your down. I watch you work hard to cover up the flaws I sometimes create in your life.  And then I watch you make everything okay for everyone around you.  I have made decisions that have affected your life in a negative fashion more than once and I am not talking about hip high red boots obviously not age appropriate.... no, I want to tell you how proud I am of you for taking my ishie decisions and turning them around for good or at least dealing with them until they fade into the abyss.  You and I have a fairly large file cabinet of errors in the Abyss State. That is if the Abyss is a State or Country or maybe just another planet in the universe where we get to file (dump) our waste.  Waste of time, waste of energy, waste of spirit, WASTE as in manure.  Worse.  Manure is spread on the earth to help grow vegetation. In our case, "Human Weeds."  No good to no one.  Our manure is spread to hurt us and that is why we send it to the planet of Abyss to contain it.  We must keep our eyes open as there are always new crops around us with manure making there way to us.  I can only pray you have not lost faith in this part of yourself.  ME! No not the manure part....the YOU part.  The ME part.  Everyone has a me inside them that messes up and the older we get the more mess ups we have put forth into our own private Universe. Not to mention the spillovers onto others Universe's.  I am here today to tell you maybe it is time you and I took better care of you.  (Each other) I like you Diane.  And I only want the best for you. Allow me to apologize for any decisions I have made that have hurt you or those around you.  And allow me to thank you for working so diligently with me in this life.  I know I haven't led you to a winning lotto ticket, rather you have found your own way to work overtime instead. Nor have I prized you with the best partner as has been obvious to all.  I have had to take into consideration that on your side of this duo is a woman who life goal is to take care of others.  You are the epitome of a giving loving heart. I have watched you throw yourself into a deep well more than once to save someone rather then throwing them a rope or a buoy.  The good book says to love they neighbor as thyself.  I believe you love yourself in spite of my sometimes incorrect decision making processing in our/your book of life.   You save plants, children, elderly folks, animals, and sometimes others that have more needs then you have to offer.  In fact at times your energy gets drained and that hurts me and you.  So maybe its time we get together, you know, heart and head all in one place all at the same time... I have learned through you that is the proper way to make healthy decisions.  Not one way or the other alone. Not just me or just you alone.   That is like a pizza with no cheese. Or a hamburger with no meat. Somethings turns out missing and leaves a bad or off taste in the pallet.  Another example is an unfinished painting. A car with three wheels.. A massage with no masseuse. A lover with no heart.  People around you with harsh words.
So from this day on you and I are going to work much closer.  And with your sense of humor, reserved and loving heart, and my brains, we can go far sister.  Get your roller skates on its time to move this happy healthy couple of us who have now meshed into one glorious human being. Mwah!
God I love you.  Why thank you. Nice outfit too.  Love Diane


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