Coffee Jolts ......................by Diane Ogden

It's Friday. I was happy to get home after a long week.  Had some hidden thoughts about doing nothing for two days until I noticed the kitty litter needed some serious refreshing in terms of a trip to the Pet Store for more Dr. Elsey's litter, which is the best I have ever experienced.  Not that I have really experienced using it of course, rather the time it lasts for my two felines.

I then cleaned the kitchen for the weekend and noticed I needed to water my several plants.  That reminded me of the time someone told me to give my plants some coffee.  It will make them happy just like it does us.  I happened to have some real coffee left in the cupboard from last year so I made a full 12 oz. cup which I then poured  on one of my plants.  I walked back to the kitchen and made another 12 oz. cup and poured that on another plant.  Then another, and two trees, and finally a spider plant and a palm. 

Suddenly the apartment smelled like hot dirt.  The smell of Hot Dirt does not smell very good. 

It was then I remembered why I had that plastic tub of real coffee left in the cupboard.  I cant drink real coffee.  It makes me sort of crazy!  I then thought to myself, as I looked up into the sun room waiting for the trees and potted plants to start making noises or moving around like the wind was blowing when it really wasn't, that they might get weird and crazy somehow.  I mean that is what coffee does to me and my friend told me to give coffee to my plants because they would have the same reaction as I do.  Little did that friend know I could end up at the E.R.  after a cup of coffee.  Its called ANXIETY.   So far no plants have freaked out, wilted, or died.  In fact they look real real happy. 

Wonder what would happen if I tried to make them happy with a Margarita!   
Probably not 12 oz. though.  I cant even do that.   I do wonder if I overdosed them with the coffee thing.  My friend did say to pour my leftovers on the plants. She didn't mention making each one a pot. (or a large cup) 

Not to worry, I wont be pouring Margarita's on my trees, or giving them coffee again in the near future (unless they grow a foot this month).  I might try pickle juice though.  They say that is amazing in many ways.  What I wont be doing is putting anymore chemicals on them or me.  They are a living thing like myself and my animals.  So I am doing some testing on my living plants.  If they die I may not drink coffee anymore ever.  I will change to Green Tea for my Tree's.

So for now, Be Safe, Be Happy, Be Healthy, and get RICH, so can counter act the KOCK Brothers takeover of our country.  You know?  The old fogies who are fracking our earth, using Roundup on our crops trying to kill us so they can make billions!  Or maybe use your money to move to an island or Norway.  They say that is the best place to live and where you can live the longest.  I wonder why?
Maybe no RoundUp there!  I betcha. 

Nite!