Monday, March 25, 2013

Esther's Hopeless Chest...............by Diane Ogden

( I have a friend I visit on occasion I call Esther.  I have changed her name to protect myself! And I have changed her husbands name and her dogs to also protect myself. These people never fail to give me great material.)
Today I visited Esther. It is never a dull or uninteresting time when I visit Esther. The Colonel saw me coming and made his exit out the back way! I do not know why except that Esther and I laugh far too much to suit The Colonel. In fact laughter makes The Colonel uncomfortable. He is a fairly grumpy human man when most of the time Esther is floating around in her rainbow dress and scarves and umbrella finding humor in most all things except him.

We were discussing a Hope Chest I happened to see in her spare room. I told her I remembered having a hope chest some years back. In fact three marriages back to be exact. Esther has had only two marriages to discuss.
 
She said, "What Hope Chest, I don't have a Hope Chest, in fact the only chest I have is the one that's given way to time and does me no earthly good except is too big for its own bra!" I laughed before telling her I meant the Wooden Hope Chest in her spare room. Then Esther laughed and laughed some more. I asked what was so darn funny. She said, "That's no Hope Chest, its my HOPELESS CHEST. Because there's no hope left for The Colonel and I and there never was any hope for the first one.
 
 I thought she was saving things for her Granddaughter in it, but Esther said no way would she pass on any more hopelessness to anyone of her offspring or theirs in any chest named hope when it wasn't true. Then we moved on to her dog Harry who had jumped up on the sofa and was sitting on her face. I said, "OMG Esther, is it clean?" She mumbled she thought so, so far anyway as I snapped a photo. Never a dull moment at The Colonel and Esther's house of hopeless chests.
 
So until I visit Esther again or find something interesting and or funny....  you know, be safe, be well, be happy, and get rich so you can either buy a real hope chest or get your old saggy one fixed!  Laters
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