Monday, February 4, 2013

CULVER'S..................by Diane Ogden

For four days I have been dreaming of driving to a nearby town, two miles away, and getting myself a Culver's Chicken Cashew salad with French Dressing.  I rarely eat dressing but always eat brownies so obviously its not because of a calorie issue.  Today was the day!  I drove the two miles, through the 20 mph school zone right at the wrong time which is how the day seemed to go anyway.... up to the window and ordered "it."   Then I said, "Ma-am, that would be French dressing as in Frank.  She said, "Huh?"   I said, "F as in Frank, French Dressing please."   I have to pull up past the pay window and do the number on the window deal and wait.  No worries.  I get my four day waited for salad and bee bop home.  Get all hunkered down and open the bag and wtfrontdoor?   I have R as in how stupid can you be RANCH? I am allergic to milk! I am livid.  Yes livid.  I have no nadda none dressing in my house.  I have brownies, but no dressing.  I go to my computer and google Culver's Verona, Wisconsin.  I get the number and call.  I hear capaso amigo (okay something like that) on the other end.  I ask for the manager in all good hopes that isn't him.(And thank God it wasn't Jane from India.)  Tim comes to the phone.  I tell him the problem and he says so sorry and offers me a free sundae.  I calmly say, "Tim, I am lactose intolerant" and wait for him to offer something else.  Nope just a sorry.  I just hung up the smart phone and mixed up some mayonnaise, flax milk and sugar for my dressing! Was it good.  Nope but I ate it anyway.  No tang like the french.  Then I had a brownie.
I should have gotten a FREE Culver's Chicken Cashew Salad considering these facts.  Maybe I should call my pre paid legal service.  Nah. 
Sooo, until I have another mishap, or find something interesting or funny.  Be safe, Be Well,  Be Happy, and get Rich so you can buy a Chicken Cashew Salad every day or even buy Culver's.
The dog liked it!   I know isn't that a hilarious photo of a truly precious 6 lb-er.  Reminds me of how we used to put our faces to close to the chrome toasters as kids and our nose looked all big.  ha
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