Tuesday, October 16, 2012

The Lovely (for my KARMA) Toaster Lamp.................by Diane Ogden



First of all I do not wish to ever hurt any one's feelings by posting a photo I have taken of their lovely property..  But Yet.....there is free speech and this one really calls for it ya know??  Come on.....a toaster lamp?  Really?  It is the ugliest or one of the ugliest items I have ever found myself to come into contact with.  Even though I have  a magnet on my fridge that says to respect every ones path in this Universe and I try to.  I respect this persons path.  I just think this lamp that is in their path with them is awful and unbecoming. It even says SUNBEAM on the side.  Dread full piece of history with milk glass accentuating its glistening glory.  Ghastly is all I can say. A toilet in some ones front yard full of flowers is better.  Only thing worse is a yard full of ceramic gremlins and other little critters with little Christmas lites strung around each and hanging this and that's.  Oh God save me. But then if that makes them happy you go people!  Me, I use those things to threaten my children.  I say:  Do as I say or I will put 200 Ty Piggy's the back window of my Buick!  Or do as I say or I will put Christmas lites on the grill of my Buick as well as buy and install a car horn that plays Here Comes Santa Claus and drive by your house playing it for your neighbors!  Might even pass by your work place....  Just Kidding!  Maybe! I actually have a bit more class in the ass than that.  Ya think?  Not sure huh?  Me either and who really cares?  I Do! I Do!  I just cant help but write the sillies.  Must be one of those days where the sky meets the horizon or the numbers say "its your day" to say whatever you want.  That would take too long. Soooo....be happy,be safe, be well, and get rich so you can buy a real lamp and not have to pretend your a hippie so you can have a this lamp by your bed so you can read "good books?"  Oh, and dream of toast!!  God I hope this person NEVER reads this because they are most likely the ONLY people who own an empty toaster cover lamp.
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