Monday, October 15, 2012

The Evil Renter......... By Diane Ogden

Okay so this is LuLu!  The Evil cat that I am caring for while my daughter finds an apt. where she can have said cat LuLu. I have tried everything to love and care for her the past ten months..  God help me.  She has destroyed every piece of furniture I own. My cat Lucy is terrified of her.  She has scratched me as I pass her by.  If she needed medical attention I would not be able to touch her to put her in the carrier.  Why?  I have no clue.  I gave her a home when she had none.  I feed her, talk baby talk to her, give her amazing treats, let her wake me up in the middle of the night when she sits on my chest and kneads my delicate skin at two a.m. thank you very much.  This cat is PISSED OFF!  She misses her old home where there were two little girls she slept with.  She is only happy when my two little girl Grands come and spend the night which isn't that often.  I have spent a lot of cash flow on repercussions of HER.  Plain to see what's wrong! She misses the caretaker she has had since she was a kitten. My daughter!  Whenever my daughter is around LuLu is happy and wonderful.  When she is not I found a great solution.  I bought a Calming Plug- In's (three so far) that are supposed to calm the cats. Over $100 big ones.  I think they drugged me too actually. (not really)  And that is a great idea for plug ins....  why not for humans too.  Anyway, daughter came to visit and when she comes LuLu gets double pissed off AFTER SHE LEAVES.  I am exaggerating because this is a blog.  Actually LuLu is a very sweet cat and mostly loves children. 
Daughter getting her own apt. and that will be cause for  a bye bye LuLu party time!I have lived with evil cat for what some call OVERTIME with no pay.  Is it good KARMA? I flippin doubt it.  Road Kill is more appreciative of my tears for them then LuLu is for my loving care and treats!!  And that is the truth. I just couldn't take her to the pound where they would have injected her with a death serum.  She isn't any different than one of my three husbands.  I kept them too long too because I am a caretaker.  I just need to UPGRADE.  So until I come across something funny  or happy or interesting, be happy, be safe, be well, and get rich in case your Jerry Springer cat hates your sofa.  Shit happens so they say and now I believe it.  Will update Lovely LuLu as we go.  I have a feeling she will be just fine.  You never know if I am telling the truth here.  Or writing?

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