So I had an appointment at my Gynecologist today due to some issues "down there." You know in the private package area. They told me I needed to have a private package ultrasound which meant they would use a "PROBE" to probe the area to view any abnormalities. Sounded like an abnormal procedure to find abnormalities. No matter what I thought it had to be done and so it was. I was laying there watching Patsy (yes a woman) prepare for the test. I found myself looking around at the equipment and noticed the name of the machine that was going to probe me is called GUS! I said to Patsy, "So, the probes name is GUS huh? A man?" She started laughing and told me that was the abbreviation for the manufacturer. Glutaraldehyde User Station. I said, "Really, well no matter cause Gus and I are about to meet and on top of that I have to pay for GUS the user?" And she continued laughing. Well better Gus than Pretty Patty Probe for sure. She asked me if I wanted to insert GUS. Really? Notsomuch Thank you, I have my own hello kitty "gus" at home. And again she found herself laughing. I was not because GUS and I were now one and being watched. Felt like 50 Shades of Gus. Results: ALSWELL as my nine year old license plate says. Although doc says the ovaries are shrinking. I said, "Really, like shriveling up? He nodded. I said, "Don't laugh your shriveling day is coming to Doc." So be well, be happy, be safe, and get rich so you can pay a real hot GUS to come be one with. Nasty Nasty.....just kidding of course.