Friday, August 19, 2011

Esther and The Colonel (she hates blue)......by Diane Ogden

Esther called me today.  I answered with the standard "hello."  All I heard on the other end was, "O - M - G!  Esther had verbalized each letter very clearly and distinctly.  I immediately said, "What, what's going on Esther?"  That is when she started talking and didn't stop for twenty minutes easy does it.  The Colonel had gone out and purchased them a new broom.  Not any broom mind you, a BLUE broom, because he knows Esther hates blue.  Her Mother loved blue and Esther has no fond memories of her mother, only her father. 
Esther and the Colonel live and ride life on a circle.  Like one of those rides at the corner park where you run and get it going and then jump on for the spin.  I forgot the name of that dingy thing.  I should rather say dizzy thing.  I never liked it and still have not so fond memories of it.  Anyway...that is how Esther and the Colonel live, like they are on that mini merry-go-round that isn't so merry!  And no one is willing to jump off and stop the dizziness.  So they fight passively with blue broom type deals.  Heck, the Colonel is so good at this game he buys everything blue he can find.  Blue blankets, blue can openers, blue coffee makers of which Esther returns with a vigor.  Blue shorts, blue shirts, blue socks, blue rags, and he even bought himself a blue car once. He writes Esther notes on the easy erase  board with bold blue marker! When he ordered Pizza he demands it delivered in a blue box. After the car purchase incident I thought Esther was going to die, but I told her she couldn't. She has to outlive him or he will put her in a blue dress, with blue hair, in a blue coffin, with blue flowers on top. That being said, Esther sat down and drew the floor plans for her new home when the Colonel leaves this wonderful earth and life without Esther.  Yup she's ready freddie. Now its just a waitin game.  She shakes and he drinks.  Yet on occasions they go out for dinner, they meet friends in happy places, and they have family over, and they have me over too.  I guess raising her three daughters, Hester, Cherrie, Cherrie's daughter Lexus, and Ramos, make that four......he is womaned out.  Can you imagine?  As for the coffins... not going there...I was just jokin cause what you give you get in return and I do not nor are I ready for a blue coffin! The happy news of the day is the Colonel is quiet, in his cave, watching the TV and resting for the next round with Esther and the girls.
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