Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Demon's Demon's Damn Demon's! by Diane Ogden

I want to say one thing.  There really are demons out there.  I know because just know.  I tell everyone I know to stay under the demon radar.  Same as under the police radar, not to implicate police as demonic of course not. Well....hhumm
Anyway, today was interesting to say the least. Today was toast. And it was toast because of Budfest, or bookfest, or rockfest, I cant remember the name of the fest, all I know is my daughters guy friend went to it and got so drunk he cant recall what an idiot he was.  The demon police called my daughter to come get demon drunk him, then told her he wasn't safe to come get.  So a cab brought him home and on the way he threw up in it which cost him $100. When at his home where he slept and threw up and slept and threw up and so on plus more, he became angry that no one took care of his sorry naken fat butt.  Then comes the demons out of his dirty drunken out of control body. How else would they get in huh?
They are in the house, in the air, in the toilet and everywhere.  He, the culprit, drunk from the fest, leaves.  His car died after his accelerator stuck, I suspect his windows shattered although no one mentioned that. As well as his head was spinning as in "Linda Blair."  Then his heart started racing, duh, ya think, then he was mean spirited, ya think? The front door of his house totally came off the hinges and fell apart, ya think? His one daughter, age 7 was scared because she said little angry boxes on strings were hanging in the air all around her head.  Call the asylum? No, call the Priest for crying out loud sakes.  What a bunch of chit.  My phone is getting bombed by the daughter needing demon help part of the afternoon.  Hey, I said I would pray.  After I pray for the demons to go, I throw up in my mouth and almost choke to death.  Oh great! Like that has never happened. I knew immediately I had gotten pulled into the green slime shit bucket of demonic dorks.  I survived but not without fear and discomfort.  At my next clients house my teeth started feeling like lightning bolts were striking them. I had to leave the job early to find a dentist and a few thousand dollars on the way to pay him. Then it suddenly stopped.  I text the daughter to see where she is.  She is on her way to her work out class.  My teeth are on fire from her friends demons and she is fine.  Well isn't that just the way it goes.  The Happy News of the day is:  I'm fine, I'm good, call the priest, do not call me and dump your demons on me
NA More! Not only all this today, but I found out my neighbor is having her boobs re-done and will be screaming "why did I do this?" Afterwards.  I will feel very helpless. Her Mom will be there, so maybe I should just be and feel helpless.  After all I didn't do it.  My boobs are just fine, it's hers that are going to make her scream.  Mine make me scream for different reasons. If I have to scream, too bad I don't have a fixed pair to scream over.  Maybe I will make her soup. No, No, she doesn't have the flu doo! Her boobs do. And I cant do anything for them.  And I wont pray so no demons come on her boobs.  That already happened. That is why she is having a re-do. I think this is a separate blog humm.   
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