Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Expensive Blue Douche from China..by Diane Ogden

Well sit down. I thought I had a bladder infection....not. I thought I might have yeast from meds...not...I thought, its a tumor or cancer, no cancer doesn't usually hurt, OK then something else horrible in my body....duh...what from? So I make the appointment.
Doc and I talk about this situation. Then she asks me if I have put anything in "my" v-j j lately. I told her I hadn't in eight years...she laughed and said, "I guess that is a definite no." She was then polite be rephrasing that question and asked if I used any special scents in "my" v-j-j lately? I said I used a vinegar and water douche as I thought I might have yeast from antibiotic.... Then I remembered......I said, "Wait, when I bought the throw away vinegar douche box I accidentally bought that awful BLUE off brand probably from China and made with road paint." I thought she would split a side laughing. I said, "I went ahead and used the blue one about a week ago, and that is about when all this started. Oh My God, I am my Mother....I used it because I paid for it!! Just like my Mother use to make us eat ALL the food because they paid for it, "It cost money," was the word.. "that is why I have been ten pounds overweight all my life. This is all my Mothers fault!" She was laughing bunches. I told her then I used the used bottle for the vinegar and water. She thinks the road paint from China might be the problem, too harsh, and I am to just leave it alone for a few days. I said, "Like it is alone anyway." So no pessary, and it burns, and hard to pee. So...I told her that "China Blue is now the most expensive douche I have ever had in my life. " I could have bought a new small leather sofa for what that appointment cost!
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